My powers

I have supernatural powers.

I was sitting on my bed fixing my bike on Sunday. Out of the corner of my right eye I saw a black spot, about the size of a quarter, fly from my window to my pocket. The instant it hit my pocket my phone buzzed and I received a text message from Scott. I looked around and I could not find the black spot that I saw, so I have come to the conclusion that I saw the physical manifestation of Scott's text message.

That's right, I can see text messages as they fly through the air. I can't read the messages, I can only see them as black quarter size spots. With this amazing power comes huge responsibility and I accept that responsibility. I promise to use my power for good, here are some situations where my new-found power will come in handy.

1. Your cell phone is dead, I can tell you that you are still receiving text messages. I can't tell you what the massages say, but you'll know you're getting them.

2. You're in an important meeting and your phone is on silent, I can tell you how many text messages you received. I can't clue you in on the urgency of each message, but at least you'll know that your cell phone is still working.

3. You're watching that Shrek movie, but you're waiting for that important text message from your girlfriend saying that she's pregnant, I can tell you that you received a text message. I won't know who it's from or what is says, but you'll know it's there. Also the lights in the theater should probably be on in order for me to see the spot.

4. You suspect that your daughter is lying to you about her text messaging. You say that she's "abusing a privilege," she says that she "doesn't even text," and that your "rules are gay," that Cindy's father is "soooo much cooler," and that she's "sixteen, I can do what I want, ahhh I can't wait to go to College, I HATE YOU." I can tell you if she receives text messages. I won't know from who, and I won't know the content of each message but who cares, you were right all along.